But I know there are worse good byes- like when you talk to someone and you both know you used to be best friends, but barely know eachother now. Or the silent kind, where someone just slips away, there, but not. So the good bye that you promise to talk everyday with smiles and hugs is not so bad, I think, in comparison. There are worse good byes.
P.S. I wrote this with my phone! So I shouldd be able to post more often, hopefully. :]
- Current Location:work
- Current Mood: melancholy
- Current Music:mocking bird
My most current drama. Mmm. Boys. In Pullman (where I used to live) I never had this problem, I just didn’t talk to guys all that much. That wasn’t exactly my choice, I just didn’t. And they didn’t talk to me. I think it was because everyone had a preconceived notion of me and just could get their heads out of their a**es and get over it. But hey, that’s high school. That’s why moving was so great for me, a fresh start. Turns out I get a long quite well with guys. Haha. (I don’t mean just romantically, I have some good friends that are guys too.) But with this whole new start and stuff, comes other complications that guys bring along. Something about having a dick makes them like to complicate things, I think. I guess I am lucky in the sense that the guys I am talking about are both good guys and like me enough to put up with things that happen. Haha.
Maybe girls are the problem, on second thought.
So, I have a boy friend [Tyler] right now, he is a good guy. But not always the best boyfriend, I’m not gonna lie. He means well, and doesn’t do anything seriously wrong. But he tends to be selfish and inattentive and in groups we never act like a couple. And I hate it, I'm not that type of girl. I like to be doted on a little, I like people knowing he’s my boyfriend, and I would be ok with him being a little selfish if it wasn’t for everything else. I honestly am super laid back, so I'm usually ok with doing what other people want. Now that I’ve said all this bad stuff I should prolly let you know he is a great guy. He loves me and makes that clear, especially when he thinks I’m unsure. He is honest and all those things, and doesn’t do anything like weed or other ‘illegal substances’ just because he knows I don’t like it and does all those things right. So, I really have no plans of breaking up with him.
But there’s Ben, who wishes I did. And has out right asked me to leave Tyler. I met him through a friend and the next day he got my number and txted me. We really hit it off. We haven’t known each other very long, but I feel like I’ve known him for years. I’m not gonna lie, I like him, but not enough… So, I flirted toyed with the idea, but I know I love Ty. It’s in my gut, I just couldn’t do it. So I flirted and we hung out, but when it came down to it I had to tell him that we weren’t gonna go anywhere because it wasn’t fair to him, you know? And there was noo way I was cheating on my bf, and I know he wouldn’t be down with that either. So, now we’re just really flirty friends. I really enjoy spending time with him and everyone knows where we stand (yes, I told Tyler all about him. Honesty is HuGe with me.) so what’s the harm?
P.S. Trust me, I know this is a bad idea, but I’ve always liked playing with fire. ;)
(loove the cheesey ending, right? ;) )
- Current Location:Work
- Current Mood: curious
- Current Music:What Do You Want From Me? by ?
- Current Location:moms room
- Current Mood: thoughtful
- Current Music:Superman Returns (movie)
Where to start?
First- I am still with the fore-mentioned boy. It is my longest relationship, which at first wasnt saying much since my longest relationship was 2 weeks.... hm... [you may laugh at me, btw.] but I think we have a long relationship now, specially for highschoolers. Haha. We are at 7 months now. Tho, things are a little down hill right now. i hate boys and their decisions to suddenly change. gr.
Second- Um. My drama from my old town is soo not gone! A couple of them decide to hate me at totally random times and I reallyy only talk to one. it is weird.
Third- I am so different!! Damn. I mean, I was superr straight edge before... thats out the window! Ahahaha. I will try to start posting like before. this is jus another nutshell post. :]
- Current Location:Mom's Room
- Current Mood: happy
- Current Music:Armagedon- the movie, as in, on TV
At first, i said there was no way I was gonna move- I even had friends I could live with until i was done with High School [i am a junior right now]. She made it clear there was no way i was gonna stay- but I am the Queen of bs, so I kept saying i was staying. So to get me to go without a fuss she got me a tatoo! : ] A cross behind my ear [I am religious]!
So now I have been here for a month. The first few weeks were kinda sketch, but after that it was pretty smooth sailing. I am settled in with a good group of friends and a new boy. That is my life in a nutshell- minus the old town drama. ugh.
- Current Location:Bonus Room
- Current Mood: good
- Current Music:the compu
- Current Location:Living Room, being all ninja-like
- Current Mood: sick
- Current Music:My little sister's damn chiming clock! I am going crazy!!
Urg! I made my first ever icon! And I was so proud of it! And then my computer wont upload it! I want to throw this damn thing at the wall!! Urg!
But (said while taking deep relaxing breathes) it is a girl's nose and mouth and you can see the collar of her leather jacket and it says "Yeah, we're bad asses..." in hott pink. It makes me sad. Oh and just so I can give acknowledgement and thanks where it's due, this is completely inspired by goonie_freak and not nearly as nice as hers. But I ha this pic (because I dauble in making cover art on my outdated programs) and i didnt know what to do with it, but I really liked it! Also my fave line was the yeah we're bad asses. So I was looking at goonie_freak 's icons and I was like. Well why not try it. So I did and I was so happy, but grrr...it didnt work...
Oh! But I also kinda made the one above, but I feel like I cant really take credit because the blue swirls and the girl in the background are actually a book cover. I just cropped it, then erased the words and added freedom. So ishly made it, into an icon at least. : ]
So I havent been on in a really long time and I just wanted to pop in and say hello before I shut off the lights tonight!
Reason for absense: School.
It is SO crazy right now. We just entered our last 3 or 4 weeks and the teachers decided to cram in the hw before we left for summer. ugh.
Anywho, g2g to beddy bye! Luvs!
- Current Location:Bed Room
- Current Mood: sleepy
- Current Music:You're Not Sorry (CSI Remix)- Taylor Swift
So I will tell you about my group drama that is now resolved. J last week was acting all cranky and angry. I knew something was up, but she wasnt telling me. I was a little upset when she told our mutual friend K first, but I am her best friend... I did get over that tho. So it is ok. Then K told me that J told her (I love chains! Ah! They are so teenage girl drama movie!...Which is almost what this is...) that she hated our friends S and Sh with the burning passion of 5,000 suns and the burning passion of 10,000 suns. S was the more hated one. Then I had to step in to avoid a huge blow out fight and try to convince them to talk on the day I was gone. Of course, my 2 stubborn and bitchy friends (I seriously believe I am a saint to have patience with my two best friends and their temper) couldnt even talk to eachother! Then when I got back on Monday they both had stuff to do and I had stuff to do, so I didnt mess with it, but was still disappointed they didnt try. was especially irratated when J left to do her thing at lunch and didnt say anything to them, but Sh thought she had. Now, usually Sh is our rock and very mild tempered, but she ws just along S with being stubborn and stupid. So J left and they started talking about her and all this drama. I promptly told them I didnt want to talk about (they were all my friends and i was even ground, I couldnt just let them rip her apart behind her back. A little complaining i ok, but this wasnt complaining)
The next day I told them I was going on a "Good Friend Strike" at lunch time if they hadn talked to eachother. I was getting sick of everyone acting so immature (of course they just kinda ignored me). Luckily, I am more stubborn than either them (when it comes to important stuff) and they both knew in their hearts this was best. I was also sick of hearing them both talk sh*t about eachother when they called me, as I said before it wasnt serious, but it was annoying. So I got to school and I was talking with J and K, something comes up about the fight and I tell her I was tired of everything and I wanted it taken care of before there is a bigger, unfixable fight. Then I add a glare and J changes the subject. Not long after, S and Sh show up.
I give both S and J meaningful looks and I know at least J understands. So she tells S she is not mad at her. S replies with a simple, "Ok," and starts to walk away. There she did it, I was so angry. I called, "S...!" "What?"she replies. "She talked to you!" (S's big thing was she wasnt the one with the problem, she didnt want to take the initiative, or hurt her pride a little to take the step and settle it). So she rolls her eyes and takes a few steps back to us. I was like, "No, I am serious. I am so tired of everyone acting like fucking 5 year olds!" Now, I rarely cuss when I am angry, only when I am joking around. So they got all got wide eyed and just looked at each other for a moment then S said in a very eloquent manner, "I love it when she gets angry!"
Yes, that was the emotion I wanted to instill. Ugh...
But it got the point across and they talked it out. So, yes I won. : ]
Also I have been driing for about a week now and I got some pretty...interesting, and slightly scary, stories to tell tomorrow. Promise. But I gots to get to bed! 'Night!
- Current Location:My very messy bed
- Current Mood: cranky
- Current Music:My puppy dog, Copper (Bopster is the nickname)
First, driving. So I took my written part of the driving test about 2 weeks ago. Then on Wednesday, I took the driving part... Oh dear. I have been practiing everything, except my backing around a corner. But why the hell do we need to know how to back around a corner? When will we do that? Is that even technically legal? I am telling you these people who make these damn laws are absolutely crazy!! Oh grrr... Then my parallel parking was spotless, absolutely pristine, until I decided to be a damn perfectionist and make it 100% straight. Points docked for that. Then once, I went from a two lane to a one lane, but at first I thought it was a two lane to a two lane. Yeah, f-ing perfect. So I did the pefectly legal *cough* thing and went into the second lane, closest lane that was legal if it was a two lane. Which of course, it wasnt. Immediately, I let out a big old "Shoot!" and continued with the drive. From there, I didnt pull close enough to the side of the street and ended up with my butt hanging out diagnolly towards the street. [In my defense, it was not in the street.] Then screwed up the backing around the corner by going way too wide and ending up, again, with my butt hanging out. [This time in the street.] During the straightening to the curb of that ordeal I ended up getting a tire on the curb. Then, finally, I stopped a little late and ended up over a stop line, into a cross walk [no people were in it, no worries] So we returned to the DOL office with knowledge that I failed and the knowledge that I would have to tell my mother of this. Whis would mean she was right when she predicted I woul fail in my forst attempt, so, if you didnt know, for a teenager that is a personal hell. And... (drum roll please...)
With an 84, below an 80 is failing, but heh. Dont be a kill joy, damn it! So I was flying high, telling my mom through her phone convo [it is a permanent attachment to her ear] that I passed over and over again in only a slightly, or not so slightly, smug way. Then promptly got odd looks from the other DOL lady behind the counter, that, instead of glaring back like I usually would, I smiled until she asked if I was gonna come get the actual liscense. But alas, I couldnt because it was not my birthday yet. Only a short and excruciating time period to wait. Ah poo.
Now, the real stutter in my happiness. When my mom, like the evil kill joy she really is [not really, actually my mom is kinda awesome] she decided to recount how many I got wrong.
I actually didnt pass. Ah shit.
So I was freaking out, and thinking they are gonna call me and etc. etc. Like full blown my head is realing and I am about ready to go screaming down the damn hall that they better not take my liscense or they will see how tempramental a teenage girl can really be if she dont get her way. I am a crazy bitch!(said in a Tyra Banks voice, or Kathy Griffin while impersonating Tyra [or Oprah] type of voice) Of course in the pure sake of funny I told this story in a similar manner and made all my friends laugh and one friend came up with this great idea.
I just needed to tell them that I had told my dieing grandmother that I had gotten my liscense and she was waiting to see me becuse my heartless parents wouldnt take me to see my fading Nana. And just start balling and pouring out this amazing sob story! I am all for it! Already got all this big old, complicated story picked out perfect. But then, after I had spent all this time to create this elaborate piece of work, my step father tells me.
Oh, if they told you that you passed, you passed. They wont change it.
How do you know? oh right, he is a traffic safety teacher. As far as I can tell he (the DOL guy, not my dad) probably gave me a few points because he thought I was nice (or he knew I would go crazy, ghetto moment Tyra banks on his ass). We had, had a few friendly conversations when I took my written test and then before we actually took the drive. I discovered his name is Brian and he is going to have a little baby girl, his first kid. And that it was ok for me to talk during the test, which I did a little. Even that small amount of human contact can sway the way someone helps eachother. So yay my over active speach vomit! haha.
I was planning on telling you all my friend drama (which is big and juicy) and my writing dilema and about a gorgeous guy, or relatively gorgeous, and shows and my sister, but this is already long and I am tired. So, in the morning then!
P.S. Please excuse the crude language in this piece, I thought it added to the effect. : ]
- Current Location:Dining Room
- Current Mood: bouncy
- Current Music:Does yelling at my sister count?
So a few things to talk about!
First, I have a community! It is actually quite exciting (no matter how lame it will probably be). It is creativ_writers and is for, well, creative writers... Go figure, right? Anyway, I wanted a friendly place for (assumably amatuer) writers of any genre. I think if I get a few people who actually want to use it as a place to... is express themselves too disney-movie-trying-to-be-teenage-proble
Next, boys! haha, not boys I have met though, unfortunately. I was watching Never Back Down with Cam Gigandet. Seen it? Yeah, it is kinda, really extra amazying. Maybe its just me, but hot guys beating each other up is very sexy! Whoot! Whoot! Come on, you know you are smiling...and now agreeing... and now laughing. I am telepathetic, I know. ; )
Really, it is probably only in movies with all the make up and good guys winning over the bad guys. It definitely has a very hott, heady allure to it. Ya know? The make up making them not look too bad helps, and knowing no one is actually getting hurt helps too. Plus there is the fun kicks and jumps that wouldnt happen in real life. But seeing the tricks and those guys (Cam Gigandet!) is very, very hott. *sigh* It is a shame I will never meet them and make them fall in love with me... or meet them and kidnap them, but they would like it because I am hott. ; ) haha.
Finally, I think I get my driver liscense later this month! Ah! How amazing right? I just have to pass the written test... and I failed the practie one online. FML.
- Current Location:Living Room
- Current Mood: anxious
- Current Music:Counting To 100 by Matt Wertz